It may be a pointless thing to write or it may not be. I am not sure. But he would have been 65 today.
When I first started going out at around 18 years old there was one night where I got home at about 2:30am in the morning with me having to go to college the next day. I didn't start drinking alcohol until a few months before then and my limit was about three drinks. I may have had four that night as I was pretty out of it.
I wasn't used to alcohol back then.
I was hungry. Very hungry.
Is this what alcohol did?
I looked in the freezer and there was a pack of chic-sticks. I could shove a few in the oven and maybe have a fifteen minute nap until they were done! What a great idea. It was cold. I also had to put the heater on in the front room.
So about twenty minutes later, I heard these heavy footsteps pounding down the stairs and I just thought "shit". Then I remember my dad shouting at me in a booming thunderous voice. Something like "COLLEGE IN THE MORNING, WHAT TIME DO YOU CALL THIS!?" etc. My head was hurting a bit.
Is this what alcohol did?
He then asked me what the hell that burning smell was. I told him I couldn't smell anything. But I could really. My chic-sticks were burning. Then it was something like "YOU PUT FOOD IN THE OVEN AT THIS TIME AND THEN YOU FALL ASLEEP ON THE SOFA WITH BOTH THE HEATER AND OVEN ON!?"
Then he said "Do you want me to order you some food? I'll give you some money."
Tuesday 26 August 2014
Pride IS prejudice
It's not a typo.
It is the end of pride weekend again in Manchester. Every year, the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people have a festival where they celebrate their lives/the way they choose to live.
I have always believed that no matter who you are, whatever your circumstances, finding happiness and acceptance is possible. I don't know the answers as to how. But SOMEHOW it is possible. Only sometimes a person can be blinded by things that they may say they are totally against to stop themselves in finding TRUE happiness.
Philosophical but back to the point. The Pride festival takes place on canal street every year on a bank holiday weekend where they fence up the outer parts of the street and then charge around £25 for people to enter the street to be able to enjoy what I imagine (if you were into the music that gets played there and all the other stuff) quite an amazing night. Everyone that goes to this festival seems to have an incredible night. Extortionate prices so surely you have to have a good night? Or you have to tell yourself you have a good night. I have yet to meet a person that said it was bad.
There have been times when I have been through canal street and the bouncers on every door have stopped me from entering the bar on which they were guarding. Why wasn't I allowed in? Was it because it was too full? No. Was it because I was too drunk? No. Was it because I wasn't dressed appropriately? No. Any of these reasons, I could accept. The reason I wasn't allowed in any of these places was because I'm not gay, bisexual or a transgender or a transsexual. The bouncer would tell me "members only." Once I was with a couple of friends and it was pouring down with typical Manchester rain and door after door we were being turned away with "members only." One of my friends didn't know what those code words meant and after being turned away five times started losing patience "how are we supposed to become members if we can't get in anywhere in the first place?!" He was even more annoyed after it was explained to him what those code words actually meant. The one place that did let us in said we would have to sit upstairs AWAY from everyone else. There was the three of us, a small bar, one disgruntled barman and the rest of the room was completely empty whilst the downstairs part was full of music, atmosphere, frolics and the rest of it. Not only that, but at midnight we were told that the upstairs part was closing-thinking we would then be able to go downstairs, we were then asked to leave the premises instead. Last orders for the downstairs part was 3am.
Last week my friend got approached in Canal Street by some thug like woman who shouted at her "What are you doing in here?! You're not a lesbian?!" My other quick thinking friend said "She's er... she's er... SHE'S BI-CURIOUS.
So can you imagine on the flip-side if there was a gay person who went into a pub and was turned away for being gay? Can you imagine if a bouncer said to this person "members only" and when challenged, the bouncer would then say "no gays." It would be in the news. On the front page:-
"Uproar as homophobic bar refuses to serve gay people."
The reaction would be huge. People would boycott the place, there would be protests, fights, riots!
Maybe I am going a bit too far. But the point is that this is no different from a person who isn't gay, getting turned away from a gay bar.
I understand that there are a lot of haters out there. A lot of homophobic people. A lot of people who don't even understand transgenders, never mind accepting and respecting them for who they are and that maybe gays, lesbians, bisexual and transgenders feel safe in an environment where they will be accepted. They wouldn't want their haven to attract people who are afraid of the unfamiliar to then maybe take some kind of hatred out on them. I do understand that. I get hate because I am Indian. I get hate because I support Manchester United. I even get misunderstood through the choice of music I listen too. I also understand wanting to be accepted. Wanting for people to understand.
But at the same time, accepting a person for who they are and what they choose to do with their lives will never be understood by a lot of people because of what society is doing to itself. Maybe there will come a day when a person can go anywhere they like without being judged, hated or misunderstood.
Without having to be a certain type of person just to be accepted.
It is the end of pride weekend again in Manchester. Every year, the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people have a festival where they celebrate their lives/the way they choose to live.
I have always believed that no matter who you are, whatever your circumstances, finding happiness and acceptance is possible. I don't know the answers as to how. But SOMEHOW it is possible. Only sometimes a person can be blinded by things that they may say they are totally against to stop themselves in finding TRUE happiness.
Philosophical but back to the point. The Pride festival takes place on canal street every year on a bank holiday weekend where they fence up the outer parts of the street and then charge around £25 for people to enter the street to be able to enjoy what I imagine (if you were into the music that gets played there and all the other stuff) quite an amazing night. Everyone that goes to this festival seems to have an incredible night. Extortionate prices so surely you have to have a good night? Or you have to tell yourself you have a good night. I have yet to meet a person that said it was bad.
There have been times when I have been through canal street and the bouncers on every door have stopped me from entering the bar on which they were guarding. Why wasn't I allowed in? Was it because it was too full? No. Was it because I was too drunk? No. Was it because I wasn't dressed appropriately? No. Any of these reasons, I could accept. The reason I wasn't allowed in any of these places was because I'm not gay, bisexual or a transgender or a transsexual. The bouncer would tell me "members only." Once I was with a couple of friends and it was pouring down with typical Manchester rain and door after door we were being turned away with "members only." One of my friends didn't know what those code words meant and after being turned away five times started losing patience "how are we supposed to become members if we can't get in anywhere in the first place?!" He was even more annoyed after it was explained to him what those code words actually meant. The one place that did let us in said we would have to sit upstairs AWAY from everyone else. There was the three of us, a small bar, one disgruntled barman and the rest of the room was completely empty whilst the downstairs part was full of music, atmosphere, frolics and the rest of it. Not only that, but at midnight we were told that the upstairs part was closing-thinking we would then be able to go downstairs, we were then asked to leave the premises instead. Last orders for the downstairs part was 3am.
Last week my friend got approached in Canal Street by some thug like woman who shouted at her "What are you doing in here?! You're not a lesbian?!" My other quick thinking friend said "She's er... she's er... SHE'S BI-CURIOUS.
So can you imagine on the flip-side if there was a gay person who went into a pub and was turned away for being gay? Can you imagine if a bouncer said to this person "members only" and when challenged, the bouncer would then say "no gays." It would be in the news. On the front page:-
"Uproar as homophobic bar refuses to serve gay people."
The reaction would be huge. People would boycott the place, there would be protests, fights, riots!
Maybe I am going a bit too far. But the point is that this is no different from a person who isn't gay, getting turned away from a gay bar.
I understand that there are a lot of haters out there. A lot of homophobic people. A lot of people who don't even understand transgenders, never mind accepting and respecting them for who they are and that maybe gays, lesbians, bisexual and transgenders feel safe in an environment where they will be accepted. They wouldn't want their haven to attract people who are afraid of the unfamiliar to then maybe take some kind of hatred out on them. I do understand that. I get hate because I am Indian. I get hate because I support Manchester United. I even get misunderstood through the choice of music I listen too. I also understand wanting to be accepted. Wanting for people to understand.
But at the same time, accepting a person for who they are and what they choose to do with their lives will never be understood by a lot of people because of what society is doing to itself. Maybe there will come a day when a person can go anywhere they like without being judged, hated or misunderstood.
Without having to be a certain type of person just to be accepted.
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