Frogs on a lily pad.

I've never heard this story before for whatever reason, even though it is very popular. I should share it as I thought it was pretty awesome. This is word for word what someone messaged me years ago. (I didn't read the message until today).

Two frogs are sitting on a lily pad. One of them decided to jump in a pond.

How many frogs are still on the lily pad??

TWO!!

One of the frogs "decided" to jump, but he never actually jumped!

The moral of this story is you need to TAKE ACTION!! Do something and do it today! The longer you wait, the more miserable your life will become. The sooner you act, the sooner you can start the long, hard journey to putting your life back together. Things WILL get better! You just have to take that first step!

My reply from Manchester United football club.

"Hi, 

Thank you for your recent email regarding the role of First Team Manager at Manchester United.

This role is currently being recruited and the board will be in contact with suitable candidates. 

We would like to thank you once again for sending in your application and thinking of Manchester United.

Kind Regards

Group Human Resources"



I tried.

Short and sweet. Notice the "Hi". I write an amazing professional email and I get a "Hi". 

They don't know what they missed out on.

Job application for Manchester United football club.

To whomever this may concern.

I am writing to you in regards to the current vacancy for the position of Manager of Manchester United football club. I wish to apply for this vacancy.

I have previous management experience, mostly in retail, bars and hospitality and I know what it takes to get the best out of my staff-something that the last manager seemed to have no idea about.

I have been a lifelong Manchester United fan and have followed this great club through thick and thin and feel that I have what it takes to manage this club. I know for a fact that I will not be as bad as the last manager and feel that I would definitely secure champions league football for the season after next. I am also confident that in my first season in charge, I could at least win one trophy-something the last manager has never achieved in all his days as a manager.

As well as all this, I would not waste ridiculous amounts of money on players who are not worthy to wear the Manchester United shirt-for example Marouane Fellaini.

Nor will I be held to ransom by players who get too demanding, want to play every single game and never want to be substituted and then have utterly disgraceful games-for example Wayne Rooney.

Also along with this, I will personally make sure that transfer deals are fully complete and not be turned into a total embarrassment.

I am passionate, fair and have great tactical awareness. I will do what is best for the squad. I will play the team I pick in a positive way-the way Manchester United should play. With excitement, personality and with penetration. All traits that the last manager had none of.

I am also willing to be paid one percent of what the last manager was on.

Yes that is right. One percent.

And I am guaranteeing silverware and champions league football.

I realise this season has been a tough one for players, staff and fans alike and I feel that I would be a a suitable candidate to bring back the glory days to Old Trafford and to leave a legacy that football has not even seen yet.

I understand that MR Ryan Giggs is to be taking over for the rest of the season. I would like to wish him best of luck. I hope you will consider me for the start of next season.

Thank you for taking the time to read this. I hope you will be in contact with me soon.

Mukesh Dhimar.

I can't afford to buy things from charity shops!

These days (I sound 100 years old now don't I?) it is so easy for some kind of trend to start. Mostly it stems from some online buzz. For example right at the minute, it seems to be some drinking game that people are dying from and before that some weird game you can get on phones. Whoopee. Something for the masses to talk about. Something for them to feel like they are with the "in crowd".

Something utterly pointless.

I thought one trend that would have stopped which hasn't, is people buying things from charity shops. Not that there is anything wrong whatsoever in buying things from charity shops. But the problem is a few years ago when a few world famous couples went into charity shops to donate some of their clothes, there seemed to be a massive surge of people who were all of a sudden "doing their bit" by purchasing things from charity shops because it's "all for a good cause" and because "you can find some amazing bargains" and also because some people may be hopeful that they could actually own some celebrities' garment to wear, smell or do whatever they felt necessary in order to...feel closer to them.

There used to be a time when you could go into a charity shop and pick up bargains. You would of course get what you paid for. A ragged hat for 50p, a torn up bow-tie for 25p or a book with half the pages ripped for 10p.

Now charity shops aren't even charity shops. Everything is so expensive! A hat I saw for £27, a tie for £14 and books are behind displayed glass cases for prices that I didn't even want to look twice at.

I saw a dress in the window which was £450. Four hundred and fifty pounds! What the hell??

They have volunteers but managers get paid a full-time wage so they have to make vast amounts of profit and the volunteers get free tickets for festivals and the theatre and whatever else they may be interested in and fuck me isn't it COOL to volunteer in a charity shop.

For customers, buying from these shops is FASHIONABLE. It's FASHIONABLE to pay for overpriced goods, it's FASHIONABLE to tell your friends "I bought this from a charity shop, HOW FUCKING FASHIONABLE AM I and also VINTAGE. Oh I am so VINTAGE."

Gone are the days of the actual humble charity shop where decent people used to go in as they simply couldn't afford to buy clothes, books or whatever else from the, simply because they hardly had any money and couldn't afford to go into normal stores.

There are two Oxfam stores on Oldham Street in Manchester. One is called Oxfam essentials and there is nothing "essential" in the shop whatsoever. The other is called Oxfam EMPORIUM. It should just be called "EMPORIUM" without the Oxfam.

The sad thing about the whole situation is the delusion it creates for people who think they doing something awesome and hip by buying stupidly overpriced bollocks in these shops when there are people out there with no clothes and no means to buy any. These charity shops should be for them so the little money that they may come across, they can maybe buy some much needed clothing to help live.

Instead the rich posh idiots are now going in INSTEAD of it being a win-win situation where people can get rid of any items they may not want so poorer people can get something that they need with the money going to charity-not to "managers" of the shops.

There have also been cases of clothing being found cheaper in normal department stores and more expensive in these "charity" shops. Do some staff buy clothes from these department stores and then sell them on for a profit that they can pocket?

It's just another blow for the poorer people in this world. It doesn't surprise me that people turn to stealing if they can't afford to buy anything from what is supposed to be something that was created for them.