A few years ago I told one of my then work colleagues that for something good to happen to me-a lot of bad things always seemed to have to happen first. I then read this same statement in a Spider-man graphic novel a week later and at the time, I couldn't believe how strange that was.
I used to think that anytime you did something bad, it would come back to get you in some way. I would always constantly think about bad things that I had done in my life and always wondered how and what I could do to make karma not want to punish me. Even though I firmly believe that you make your own decisions and your own path in life, I also believe that things are always going to try and break you and I also used to believe that past misdeeds would come back to haunt you. But now I am not so sure.
There are so many cruel idiots in the world. Nothing bad I see even surprises me anymore. As I have mentioned before, I would always question people as to why they were behaving in such a way-they would never have an answer purely because they would never need an answer because Karma hasn't done anything to them. Their lives aren't bad, so why would they need to question themselves?? One of many examples is how many times do you hear about a woman staying with her unfaithful boyfriend?? Or a husband that beats her?? You hear about it all the time. The woman still stays with them. "But he really loves me, I know he does" or "But he will change for me, he told me so" etc etc etc..... But the point is that she will stay with him because she is punishing herself. The guy will never then need to think that he needs to change. Why should he as this is the kind of behaviour is what the girl must like so therefore he will never have to wonder if Karma will come to get him. As much as I love Manchester United, it was strange that after the Wayne Rooney cheating on his wife with 2 prostitutes story came out, his wife ended up staying with him and he ended up getting a pay rise from the club from £100,000 a week to up to £250,000! Is this Karma??
I saw a complete idiot who was one of the Pakistanis who bullied me in school. He also repeatedly used to sexually harass a girl in one of my classes. At the time I was too much of a coward. Way too much. (Just want to mention that he is probably one of the ugliest people in the history of all people). I was convinced that sooner or later his life will become so bad it would be unbearable and that he would want to commit suicide. That is if he wasn't killed in some horrible way first. When I saw him, he was getting out of a brand new Range Rover with his wife/girlfriend and son. He was laughing (Ugliest laugh I have ever heard) and didn't notice me. So much for fucking karma. (First time I have sworn on my blog) I mean there could be many problems in his life and stuff but from where I was standing, that didn't seem the case. Is this Karma??
I then started to think that maybe it was all just random chaos and anything could happen to anyone at anytime. But that thought didn't last too long in my head.
I think now, it has come to the point where I am actually starting to believe that you have to be evil to have a good life. You have to do bad things and then good things will happen. I would never in my life encourage people to do bad things nor would I ever purposely do bad things. But it seems that if you want to be happy then this is the way to go.
There could be a heaven. There could be a hell. Where the people mentioned above might just burn for eternity. But I'm beginning to think that people feel the need to believe that heaven and hell must exist to make sense of this all. People need to believe. What is the point in living life and watching people who don't deserve happiness be happy and more better off?? If I knew for sure that there was a hell then it probably wouldn't bother me as much. But let's face reality-there isn't a heaven or hell most probably and as harsh as it sounds, our bodies probably just rot and then we end up getting forgotten about.
There just doesn't seem to be much justice in the world.
As for our souls?? Things like The X Factor, Pop music and Facebook have probably long killed them by the time we die. Well, long killed most of them.
