The new girl part 2

I guess trying to meet the new girl and getting to know her is still very possible. But of course, the way I am, I would still make it as difficult for myself as possible. On par with climbing a mountain.

Now the new group I have moved into, I was very wary of at first. From what I had seen of them, they would mess about so much and throw things, swear a lot etc, I wasn't very happy with it. The manager seemed like a lovely lady, though the supervisor I thought at first was disgusting. I was proved right about that. Work wise, he is very good, I cannot deny that. But the guy is a perverted freak. He would constantly feel up the dolly bird from this post up all the time:-

http://muksblogaboutstuff.blogspot.co.uk/2012/09/ignorance-is-stupidity.html

With the dolly bird of course liking it but telling him not to do it. Not telling him in a way that would actually stop him doing it but rather in a way where he would do it even more and then she would get a banana out and start peeling and eating it.

Right. OK.

But the way he talks and acts about and around ladies isn't the kind of thing I like. The kind of douche-bag that I have wrote about in my previous post. The kind of guy girls seem to go for. Even if he does refer to girls as "bitches" and says things like "I wanna smash that". Oh and not to mention that he actually has a girlfriend already. THIS is the kind of guy that the girls go for. 99% of them anyway. So let's talk hypothetically if that really is the case. There are about 200 people on my floor at work so working on average if we said that 100 of them were girls, that would leave me one girl. So on my endless search in finding that elusive 1% who isn't a friend, who is a genuinely nice girl who likes me for myself and who (I'm sorry but I really do not want to come across as shallow) is pretty, has a great personality and who doesn't like douche-bags is difficult to find. Now I do want to state again, that I am not shallow or narrow minded and people who are reading this may think that. But the majority of the ladies in our office look and act like they belong in The only way is Essex or one of those awful Jeremy Kyle type talk shows.

As this new girl seems to make me sweat more, makes me weak at the knees and makes my heart skip so many beats that I do think it might pop out and splatter someone over the face with, I kind of think I NEED to get to know her. If she isn't going to be someone who likes me, or even if I end up not liking her, at least then I would know.

Today, just before lunchtime, the douche-bag wants a drink of water and decides to tell us all he is going to get one. A girl in our group who has been working there a year and who CLEARLY likes him asks him if he could get her a cup of water.

"As if I am gonna get you some water. Fuck that."

Bearing in mind that he was going to the water machine anyway, bearing in mind how I wrote on my last post about how I went across the other side of the whole office to get some cups for the new girl. Bear in mind I would probably do that for any girl as I believe that it is the gentlemanly thing to do. But unlike with the new girl, with anyone else, I would probably strike up a conversation. Bear this all in mind for what's coming next.

So at lunch time, my group were all sat around a table eating really unhealthy food when the subject of relationships came up. Now I do get this a lot "Don't worry, we'll find you a lady". But that really isn't the point. I want to be happy. That is the main thing. I have to focus on making my life better for myself. Now I do believe that people can be happy, sometimes they choose not to be for whatever reason. Anyway, in comes the new girl with her group which was my former group who all seem to have forgotten who I was. They all sit a couple of tables away from me with the new girl facing me. Be cool Mukesh. You can do it. You can be cool.

But the problem is, I CAN'T be cool. That is always the problem. So then I start becoming really self conscious in the way I was eating. The way I looked. The sweat. The knees going weak and being so glad that I was sat down. Was my heart actually going to burst through my chest and splatter the guy sat opposite me who was stuffing his face with pizza? Was this the moment it was actually going to happen? What a way to go. The thing was that she did catch my eye a few times. Shit.

Anyway, the douche-bag supervisor then asks me:-

"So, you want me to get you some faj or what? I can get you pussy no problem."

I tried in vain to explain to him how he shouldn't talk like this and that it was a problem with a lot of the guys today in the attitude and behaviour like this. So he then asks me:-

"OK so is there anyone you wanna do?"

Not really wanting to get into a conversation with a sleazy douche-bag about this I said no there wasn't. Luckily our lunchtime was over and being careful to look cool whilst I was getting up from my seat, making sure my knees didn't go so weak I would fall in the middle of the canteen and making sure I didn't look back to see if the new girl even noticed me leaving. I did it. I remained calm. I was cool. Mission accomplished. Me and the douche-bag headed off back to our part of the office. Unfortunately, the conversation still wasn't over.

"Come on, I can get you the faj. There's gotta be someone you wanna smash."

Again, I tried in vain to explain to him why he shouldn't speak like that and just to shut him up, I told him about the new girl and the response I got was this:-

"Oh. Yeah. Her. I've 'ad her."

"Excuse me?"

"I said I 'ad her innit."

An all too familiar wave of nausea swept over me "What do you mean?"

"I mean I 'ad her. Went to her house other night, she ended up wanking me off whilst I sucked her tits.
Fucking fit as she is. Dirty bitch though. In my car and everything."

Even though I have said over a million times that this is the kind of thing that happens, I was still in disbelief.

"What?? Why did she go near you?? And you have a girlfriend anyway. Are you being serious??"

"Yeah it's just on and off with me and my girlfriend. We were off then, we're back on now. Ha ha. My girlfriend is well fit. Not told her. Ha ha."

I realised that he was indeed telling the truth.
I also then realised that this is the kind of thing I should really expect.
It is ALL there in black and white. It is ALL there already in my mind.
But when this kind of thing does happen again, why am I surprised?

Again-the universe really does know how to annoy me. What a fucked up sense of humour the universe has.

The new girl

It's amazing how crazy and loopy a girl can drive a guy.

I have been working at my job for about 2 months now and it is one of those really mundane jobs. But it was a mundane job that I actually wanted. One of those jobs where you can just go in, do the work and go home. I sell home insurance over the phone. Normally it's a case of:-

"I believe that your home insurance is coming up for renewal."
"No it isn't."

I have actually "majorly breached" twice. Not intentionally but on one call I entered the wrong date of birth and on another call I didn't read out a lot of stuff that I was supposed to. After both occasions I was "investigated" by 2 people who would put Sherlock Holmes and Colombo to shame. Now these breaches can be quite common for new starters. They made sure that I understood how the world might actually end if I breached again.

Fair enough.  

Now although I wanted a mundane job, somebody like me can't really stay in a job like this without being bored. I know there are a lot of people who are happy with jobs like these. But I need some kind of excitement. Something to make the meaningless days that are actually passing by worthwhile.

So we have a new girl starting.

Now this to me is exciting. Mainly because the new girl is probably the prettiest girl in the whole of the building nevermind just the office. The fact that she was put in my group is even more exciting. I tend to do this thing where if I do come across a girl like, I would think of about 16,000 scenarios of how to start a conversation with her but then just never end up talking to her at all. I have had a crush on a girl for about 5 years now and we have probably spoken about 5 times (not including the times when I order a drink from her) This is classic Mukesh.

So halfway through my shift today I went to fill my bottle of water up from the water machine. She follows me. This was totally unexpected. I wasn't prepared. She then says:-

"Are there any cups"?

This was my chance to turn on the charm. Come on Mukesh:-

"Nup, erm, if you go over there near that other....across...I'll go and get you one."

"OK thanks but I need two"

"........"

I then walk across the floor and go to the other side of the whole office and grab 2 cups. I still had a chance to turn this around. Go Mukesh. I return to where she was standing and say:-

"........"

"Thanks."

Now OK fine, things didn't work out then. No worries. She is in my group. Tomorrow is another day. The one advantage that I do have over a lot of other guys it seems is that I would consider myself a gentleman. I didn't used to a few years ago but when I see how the majority of guys treat ladies, I do think that I am compared to what I have seen, a nice guy and it does make me think that I must have someone totally amazing coming for me in life. Even though I find that most girls like guys that are total douche-bags (I have stated this many times) that there will be a lovely girl out there who likes me for me and doesn't like douche-bags. I HAVE to tell myself that this is the case. So like I said, there will be more chances to get to know her.

So anyway, since my 2 breaches, I have made sure that the past 2 weeks, I read EVERYTHING I was supposed to and I have actually been one of the best in the whole of the department (of about 40 people). If I carry on like this, my commission will be amazing and with this new girl starting things could get really exciting.

So at the end of my shift today one of the managers wants to speak to me. I was assuming he was going to tell me how amazing I have been the past 14 days or so. Instead he says:-

"We're going to move you to another department. You've done really well the past 2 weeks but because of your breaches last month, we're going to move you somewhere else. It's in your best interests as you are still in your probation period."

Now it will be a case of:-

"I believe your car insurance is up for renewal."
"You're too expensive, get lost."

So I won't be anywhere near the new girl.
I get moved JUST when I am starting to do really well.
The universe really does know how to annoy me.