I just wanted to do another light hearted post before I do one of those serious ones again so here we go. Quotes that I have heard the last month or so-oh and my thoughts on some of them:-
Sir Alex Ferguson talking about how he wanted to sign Steven Gerrard when he was younger and being asked if he felt sorry for him for never having won a title in his career:-
"I don't think it's a pity he hasn't won the league. Are you joking?"
Alan Shearer on Frank Lampard:-
"He's 34, but that doesn't matter."
Why the hell mention his age in the first place if it "doesn't matter" then Alan??
Megan Fox on reality after the birth of her child. (Just note before the birth of her child she had said she wasn't going to show off her body anymore for respect of her child. The following picture is one of her posing in a magazine AFTER giving birth. I have cut out the title of the magazine):-
"What distracts me from my reality is Bigfoot."
What the fuck? You're as stupid as you look.
Heidi Klum on men:-
"I don't want anyone younger."
That rules me out! I actually prefer her to the beast above:-
Jenny Frost on being pregnant:-
"I feel sexy."
Jenny who?? And what?? I probably should put a picture of her up too but what's the point? Seeing gross Megan Fox is bad enough.
Christine Bleakley on getting married to Frank Lampard this year:-
"We'll definitely marry at some stage this year."
Bet they divorce within 5 years.
Dita Von Teese on her music video:-
"Uh, I can't sing"
You really think that ANYONE IN THE WORLD is going to be focusing on your singing when in the video you are being felt up by 2 men and then there are a sea of naked bodies (which are supposed to represent the inside of her mind apparently). Well if there was someone like that then all the electro bollocks will make your "singing" voice better anyway.
Anna Kendrick (Who?? Fuck knows) on masturbating (Yep, that's right) over Ryan Gosling (Who?? Again, fuck knows):-
"Ugh, never going to a Ryan Gosling movie in a theatre (cinema) again. Apparently masturbating in the back row is still considered as 'inappropriate'."
Rumours are that these 2 apparently "famous" people who I have never even heard of are going to be in a soon to be made movie adaptation of 50 shades of bollocks.
Gemma Arteton (remember her? http://muksblogaboutstuff.blogspot.co.uk/2010/09/gorgeous-idiot.html) who after saying she has a nice house, nice car, never has to worry about food and stayed in a hotel recently where the hotel was so nice she nearly cried:-
"That sort of thing is never going to become the norm for me. I see my working class background as a gift."
Most of us won't ever be able to 'live in a nice house' or 'drive a nice car' or stay in hotels that 'nearly make you cry'. That IS the norm for you. Some people will never ever experience that and will struggle for the rest of their lives. That is the norm to them. Well done for being blessed with good looks though so you never have to struggle in life.
Jennifer Lopez to her boyfriend who is 18 years younger:-
"Why don't you find a young girlfriend and get out of here? What do you want with me?"
He is probably with you for your money and at the minute, your bum still looks nice-give it time and he'll be gone.
Ian Holloway (The football manager who said he would NEVER leave Blackpool football club...only to leave when they offered him more money at Crystal Palace and then claiming "it was time to move even though I said I never would. It definitely wasn't for financial reason.") on Luis Suarez:-
"He can be the new Eric Cantona for Liverpool."
Ian Holloway, you are a stupid jackass.
Lance Armstrong on a famous TV show after being found guilty of the fact that he used drugs to win 7 Tour de France races:-
"I've lost all future income. You could look at that day and a half when people (his sponsors) left. That was a $75 million day. Gone. Gone. And probably never coming back."
He was never my sporting hero. But it would be pretty bad if one of my favourite sports stars a few years down the line were found out to have done drugs. Sometimes I guess Karma does come back and bite you in the backside. he never would have had that much money in the first place if he didn't cheat.
And that's it for now. I will maybe do another one. Part 3.
