Carry on

On the night/morning of Monday 11th/Tuesday 12th of December 2017, I found myself uncontrollably crying in my bed. I couldn't sleep and I felt so down that I couldn't think straight, I was barely moving and had no clue what to do.

It felt like no matter what I did/do/was going to do was wrong. Nothing I did was right. No matter where I was. At work, at home, in between the two, wherever. A build up of frustration, sadness and lost hope had all finally got to me. I had work the next morning and tried to listen to some "music for sleeping" tunes on my earphones which was lovely but rather than making me sleep, it just made me want a harp and a piano. I was in a bad state. How the heck was I going to go to work that morning?

"I try my best and everyone keeps constantly shitting on me".

Everyones' circumstances are different and I am sure that a lot of people sometimes get like this. But what could anyone do to not feel like this? It took a long few hours but fear not my beautiful readers, I have some advice:-

People out there in the world are going to try and make your life hell. Sometimes things are not going to go your way no matter what you do. There are going to be people who take out their own frustrations on you. NOBODY will appreciate what you do. You won't get ANY support. They are going to make you feel down because that is just who they are and what they do. BUT THAT IS OK.

The reason being is that as long as YOU try YOUR best with whatever you are doing. Whatever goals/dreams/ambitions that you have. WHATEVER they may be, as long as you try your best regardless of what your situation is, regardless of what your circumstances are and regardless of what people say and/or do to you- as long as you know you do what you can to make things OK then....... it is OK.

If you can somehow (this is NOT an easy thing to do) take a step back from it all and look at yourself and just think :-

"Have I tried today?"
"Did I do the best I can?"
"Am I a good person?"

If you can seriously consider these questions and answer "Yes" to them and you believe it, then you've done it. I am not saying that you should do this everyday but when you are feeling low. When times are tough. There are going to be people and unfortunately maybe even those closest to you that are going to make you feel lower and make times tougher.

But you have to carry on. As lonely as it may feel sometimes. And as hard as it is.